Thursday, January 19, 2012
Selfish
I've probably talked about this before, but selfishness is an issue. I hat how selfish I am. I absolutely despise myself when I know that I have been selfish, and yet I continue to act out of that space. It seems like it almost impossible not to and yet still be yourself. I mean, I think the ideal is that you are most truly yourself when you exist for others, but in some way I don't know of the possibility to be unselfish all of the time. I say this because I have felt from how deep ingrained in me this selfishness comes. It's almost something that's just a part of me at my core. It comes out in passion and emotion, not simply in choice of what is most convenient. There must be a way to temper this, but at the same time, is tempering this tempering part of the passion that drives you? I really don't know more than to say on this issue, one which seems to plague me all the time, I am lost.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Wisdom
"The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom." - Proverbs 1:7.
What exactly does it mean to fear God? Is it fear of everything that we "have" being taken away? If so, what is it that we can say that we actually "have"? Maybe fear of God really isn't fear at all, but an acceptance and acknowledgment of the greatness of God and how beyond our comprehension God is. Could that be the beginning of wisdom? That would mean that it is through humility that we find wisdom. I'm on board for that. Now if only I had some humility... Know where I can get some?
What exactly does it mean to fear God? Is it fear of everything that we "have" being taken away? If so, what is it that we can say that we actually "have"? Maybe fear of God really isn't fear at all, but an acceptance and acknowledgment of the greatness of God and how beyond our comprehension God is. Could that be the beginning of wisdom? That would mean that it is through humility that we find wisdom. I'm on board for that. Now if only I had some humility... Know where I can get some?
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Taken for Granted: Memories
This is for Edith.
Our brain is a powerful instrument. It allows to accomplish so much, ironically, without even thinking about it. We can calculate spatial distances, balance on two legs, interpret the messages being sent from our eyes, and many other things without a single thought. One of the most amazing things it does is store so many pieces of information, so many experiences, imprinted on the fabric of our being. We remember faces, names, feelings, smells, information, emotions, sounds, ideas, thoughts, concepts, to name just a few. How often do we take all of this for granted? Well, basically every single moment of our lives, because what does our life look like without these memories? What if we forget who our best friend is over night? What if we forget how to play UNO? What if we can't remember our birth day? To put myself in that situation is almost traumatizing. It's humbling for me to think about if I would ever have Alzheimer's or be involved in an accident to the point where I would forget all of these things. It's humbling to know how much I take these things for granted and gives me the utmost respect for anyone who has to go through something like that. It makes me ashamed to say how ungrateful I have been for something that is such a part of me that I don't even think about it. So, I guess my point and only suggestion to myself is this: be grateful for the gifts that we are given, many of which we don't even think about. In general be grateful for the gift of life that we have been given. If we continue over and over again to do that, then we will live good lives, faithful to our true selves. Peace always.
Our brain is a powerful instrument. It allows to accomplish so much, ironically, without even thinking about it. We can calculate spatial distances, balance on two legs, interpret the messages being sent from our eyes, and many other things without a single thought. One of the most amazing things it does is store so many pieces of information, so many experiences, imprinted on the fabric of our being. We remember faces, names, feelings, smells, information, emotions, sounds, ideas, thoughts, concepts, to name just a few. How often do we take all of this for granted? Well, basically every single moment of our lives, because what does our life look like without these memories? What if we forget who our best friend is over night? What if we forget how to play UNO? What if we can't remember our birth day? To put myself in that situation is almost traumatizing. It's humbling for me to think about if I would ever have Alzheimer's or be involved in an accident to the point where I would forget all of these things. It's humbling to know how much I take these things for granted and gives me the utmost respect for anyone who has to go through something like that. It makes me ashamed to say how ungrateful I have been for something that is such a part of me that I don't even think about it. So, I guess my point and only suggestion to myself is this: be grateful for the gifts that we are given, many of which we don't even think about. In general be grateful for the gift of life that we have been given. If we continue over and over again to do that, then we will live good lives, faithful to our true selves. Peace always.
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