Soulmate

So I was scrounging for some way to kill some time and happened to run across this article on soulmates:

http://blisstree.com/feel/the-great-soulmate-debate/

It's not the most eloquent of writing, nor the most romantic.  It has some things I like and some things I don't.  So, what else would I so but give you, my non-existent readers, my opinion on soulmates.

Even as a self-proclaimed "hopeless romantic", I absolutely do not think that there are soulmates.  I think the idea of there being ONE person out there who is somehow magically and mysteriously matched to be absolutely perfect for another person is ridiculous.  That would result in there being some sort of predestination (not necessarily that everything in the future is planned, but planning in a certain sense).  I just simply think that's illogical.

While I say that, I think that people can become "soul-mates."  I think two people grow into being THE ONE for someone else.  I think that through understanding, through shared experiences, through emotions, through inside jokes about words that have nothing to do with what you're actually talking about, through births, through deaths, through respect, and definitely through communication on extremely deep levels, we become THE ONE.  It takes a certain amount of compatibility and there are definitely people that can't be THE ONE for another person, but I think that more than one person can reach that level.  Honestly, it would suck if there was only one person that could be THE ONE for you.  The key is mutual growth into that person for one another.  We have to grow with them to be each other's ONE.  Unfortunately, that's not very easy...

Maybe, I'll continue this thought another time, but until then, I have to run.  And, I'm going to continue searching for my ONE.  I guess that kind of makes me a "hopeful romantic"...

Give yourself to love

Love is really what we're all after...

"Thanks"-giving

One of my many pet peeves that I have of society is our overuse of very important words, or if not overuse, then sincerity.  "I love pepperoni pizza" just doesn't really cut it in my book.  I understand what people are saying and I won't look down upon someone who says this, but I think it admirable when people don't use words like "love", "sorry" or absolutes like "all", "everyone", etc. so flippantly.

For me "thanks" has become one of those words that we just throw out there.  When someone opens the door for you, someone hands you something, a quick, very muddled "thanks" is usually what results.  For me that doesn't really show the gratitude, even for some small measure, that we really should be giving out.  How much effort does it really take to look someone in the eye and really mean your "thanks".  Or maybe, say something like "Thank you so much, I really appreciate it."  For me, that just shows someone that you really are thankful.  It could even just be the tone of voice and the pace that you say it at.  Just some way of actually showing that it's genuine and heartfelt.  I know it kind of sounds picky and dorky, but I think it's something that we, myself included, could all work on.  And, why not now, when we approach the "Thanks"giving holiday.  It could mean a lot to someone to just really be thanked for something, no matter what it is.

Life's not Fair

I don't think it's a very bold statement to say that life is not fair.  I wasn't given the musical ability of Mozart, the genius mind of Da Vinci, or the golf swing of Tiger Woods.  Not fair!  Not fair!  Not fair!

Something I think we often fail to think of, however, is how unfair life is in a good way.  How unfair it is that I was born to parents who loved me.  How unfair it is that I was given a healthy genetic make-up.  How unfair it is that I have never had to worry about food from day to day.  How unfair it is that I have the ability to learn.  How unfair it is that God's love and forgiveness and grace go beyond anything that I could ever do wrong...

God really isn't fair at all... He gets all the glory, all the praise, and all the credit.  He's too good.  How can I ever compete with him?  Easy answer: we can't.  And I'm OK with that.  I'm OK taking advantage of his unending love and grace because all he wants to do is give it to us and have us accept it.  My mantra lately has been "I am not worthy"... life is unfair, and that's ok...

On Your Own

How nice is it to be on your own?  To do everything you want to do... to have the confidence to think that everything you do is right... to have the skills and abilities to get it ALL done...

Funny thing is... we can never do anything on our own.  We could never succeed on our own.  We might be able to get by, but that will eventually run out when we realize what is actually going on.  When we realize that we're the only ones in the dark and cold room.

We need one another.  We need to be vulnerable at times.  That's hard though.  I know it's very hard for me to be vulnerable.  I always think that I kind of have a grasp of things and can get things done.  I'm pretty in control of myself, my actions, my body... but I struggle to be vulnerable.  I get by, but in order for me to grow, I need to grow into that humility.  I need to be vulnerable at times.  I suck at that. 

We not only need one another... we need God... we need to acknowledge that we don't really do anything.  It's all from God (or whatever else you might call God).  That changes our perspective of everything.  It is also very problematic though.  Is what I want for myself good or bad?  Is what I want to do for others really just a selfish motive?  How can I be the best me?  But, I will always fall short of the best me... is that OK?

To be honest, understanding that I will always fall short of the best me means I am acknowledging a more correct notion of myself in the grand scheme of things.  I am not perfect.  I am not perfect.  I am not perfect.  No matter how it seems, I am not perfect... Sometimes we need to remind ourselves of that.  That's what forgiveness is for...  asking forgiveness is showing vulnerability... I suck at being vulnerable... but then again, I'm not perfect...

A new commitment

New commitments are hard things to deal with.  I would like to say that they're always fun and exciting and easy, but that's simply not the case.  As most of us know, they're usually frightening and scary.  They bring out this "I'm not worth anything or not able to do anything" kind of fear in us.  It's almost as if everything we've done in our lives hasn't meant anything.  It's as if we suddenly doubt our own wonderful capabilities.  Well, here it is, to the audience of only myself, I'm committing to start writing on this silly thing that we will attempt to call a blog.  I'm going to just write.  To just shoot shit out of my head in hopes that somehow either myself or someone else will make sense of it.  Maybe somebody will actually read it sometime.  Maybe it will have an impact on someone.  Maybe, there won't ever be anything to make from it.  Only time will tell.  But the fact is, I like to write.  I like to share my thoughts.  I like to share quotes that I've heard.  I like to share music that touches the depth of my soul... so... until next time ;-)